Michael Jackoff, Billy Mays, Farrah Fawcett, and lest we forget Ed McMahon

Well, it was suggested I give this Celebrity Asshole e-Vite a whirl... First off, I don't give two shit-smeared, wooden nickels about Celebrities!! Hell, I don't celebrate any of these shitheads! They're bipedal hominids that eat, shit, and fuck the same as you or I! Well, with the exception of Wacko-Jacko. I really am clueless as to why we place so much Goddamn importance in these skin-bags?! Must be something about either wanting your own flea-bitten existence not to suck so much; or that whole Cult-of-Personality thing just really makes so many humans salivate over the news of one of their trips to the grocery store to buy Tampax, or their drunken escapades in the Camoros?!?! Or any other number of moronic reasons capped up inside pusillanimous, cob-web ridden brain boxes! I mean, don't get me wrong, some people are intriguing!! It has been my experience that the vast majority of people I have run across are shit-tons more apt to pique my interest, than someone I've probably never, or will ever meet! Give me the Chromosonally challenged, gapped-toothed, Hay-seeds I had to endure growing up any day! Those Goggle-eyed Fuck-tard's are WAY more interesting to me! I could write a fucking compendium on human frailties and depravity!!

The people I listed in my title are the only Celebrity e-vites I could care to even consider! You know why?! I'm sure you do... THEY'RE ALL FUCKING DEAD!! Probably the only one of them that was truely worth a Tinkers Damn was Ed McMahon! At least he learned how to fly a plane to shoot down Japs and Krauts! Although I think he did neither. And that my friends is stretching it! He did after all host that hideous glut of human pond-scum, Star Wretch! The precursor to all that's foul on the One-Eyed-Brain Destroyer today! So....FUCK HIM TOO!!!

As for the others, well, I didn't know any of them personally. I only have gut reactions when I hear their names ( other than wanting to hurl ). Jacko, Just a stunted child living in a mans body ( quite possibly alien ). Brought on by a "living vicariously through your spawn", domineering, sociopathic, father. Billy Mays, Anybody with that much hutzpah to shuck fucking detergent to unthinking Lilliputians has got to have several thousand screws loose! Hearsay that it may be, I am of the understanding he was a fucking maniacal lunatic, and a control freak! Farrah Fawcett, Charlie's Angels and Bionic Woman!! Need I say more? I guess the fact that she was hanging, in her goofy 70's striped swimsuit, in about every dick-hard young man's bedroom wall or door, is a sad claim to fame also. Just think... "Mom, when I grow up I want 35 gazillion posters of me in my skivvies printed up so young, hormone ridden males can have pretend, 2-d sex with my quivering (soon to be cancerous) anus"

Fuck It!!! No e-Vite responses I'll have to worry about here!!! Scuttled off this Mortal Coil, only to be replaced by the next freak-shows, that we've made, to bite it!! Good riddance!!